If you are like most folks, you have those little voices in your head influencing you towards selfish or kind acts. These are usually visualized as a Shoulder Angel and Devil.
Unlike most folks, I completely lack these two entities. My little voices would be better portrayed as Shoulder Admiral Ackbar and Jay&Silent Bob. Here is an example of conversation I would have:
FRIEND: Hey Lazy, we are going bowling tonight, wanna come?
*Poof* Shoulder Ackbar appears
ACKBAR: IT’S A TRAP!
ME: I agree, figment of my subconscious, they are going to make me put on someone else’s shoes and get all sweaty.
*Poof* Shoulder Jay&Silent Bob appears
JAY: That’s exactly what I did with your mom last night, nooch. (Silent Bob agreeably nods)
ME: Dude, cut it out with the mom-jokes, ok? They are lame.
JAY: Your mom says you’re lame, that’s why she called me over. (Silent Bob fist bumps Jay)
FRIEND: (Looking at me talking to my shoulders) What the hell is wrong with you?
JAY: Yeah, what the hell IS wrong with you? (Silent Bob looks at me like he smells a fart and thinks I did it)
ACKBAR: Your ego can’t repel ridicule of that magnitude!
You can probably guess how this ends. Just in case you are too lazy to guess, it ends with me not going bowling, or having any friends. Well, except for Shoulder Ackbar and Jaybob. They got my back.